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Experiments with Ink by Paccastudios
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(Source: celticsight, via gastelpoth)
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I went for a long walk today on this overgrown asphalt road not too far from my apartment. It was closed a few years back because they built a new tunnel through the mountain and the old road was deemed too dangerous for traffic what with the huge cliff face looming above it and the huge pieces that fall down on the road occasionally… It has kind of a post-apocalyptic vibe… Nature is reclaiming it and there are saplings pushing their way through the asphalt some places.
I like it. It’s like my private little slice of the end of the world.
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…and I saw a cool bird today.
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Paul Sharits
Ray Gun Virus (1976)
MOMA Exhibit, 2010
I’ve showcased some other work by Sharits on my blog. -
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Concerning my ongoing self-portrait series, or an artist statement
I think there lies within every individual some basic need to leave behind a legacy.
A man spends his life painting every day in order to one day hang his paintings in a gallery and have people tell him that the paintings are beautiful. A teenager practices the guitar in his room for several years in order to become good enough to become a rock star; to write a million songs about everything he cares about and have people listen intently. There are certainly some that are only out for the fame and the glory but I believe that in everyone there is this need to create something that will last.
I myself have tried for many years to find something that I feel I am good enough to make a living of and consequentially I have been too harsh with myself to the point where I don’t show people much of what I create. I’m an unmotivated perfectionist of the worst sort.
When I was younger I would write long discourses on what ever crossed my mind, vast and near-neverending trains of thought and poetry that I posted online and that were, to me, beautiful. I learned how to write decent English because of this and it gave me joy to see others enjoying what I had written. At some point it became trivial and boring and I feel that I have since lost the ability to write as freely as I once could, perhaps a result of aging or as a result of creative fatigue.
I was good at it and I quit.
I spent many years writing music for myself, for friends, for films, and so forth until the point where it has become almost a robotic maneouver; something I just do because I can and because it is something I know. I’ve never tasted fame or mass recognition because of it and all I have to show for it so far are a limited cassette release on a blog label, being mentioned in end credits of a few minor films and some pittance from digital downloads. Still, I enjoy it.
I was good at it and I still am.
I took up drawing for a few years, learning basic human anatomy from Youtube videos and PDF-files I downloaded from pirate websites. I traveled around Eastern Europe for a few months by myself and thoroughly enjoyed sitting outside cafès drawing people and painting skin tones with cappucino and wine.
I don’t draw much now but I am OK at it.
It has taken me 23 years to realize that I can never do anything perfectly and that I should be content with what I create and that I should be proud enough of it to show it to other people. Art is something I should just do, free from the restraints of views, statistics, criticism, galleries, vernissages, fame and pretense. It is something I should enjoy.
I’ve not yet found my masterpiece or even the means for me to begin working towards it but I will continue making these videos about my life and my thoughts for the rest of my life. They will be truthful and they will be an honest representation of an individual trying to create something that is his in a increasingly individually polarized world.
Perhaps, when I am 80 years old and on my deathbed my children will be able to view these videos in order that they may learn from them and perhaps even be inspired.
I have not yet found my masterpiece but I think I may have found my grand project. -
just to clear up some things concerning my ongoing self-portrait series.
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wow this is such a beautiful view.
it is! but it gets boring when you live here for 20 years -
Will we be able to order ever?
I think he only made one for himself… but that could be a good plan
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May 5, or constructing vague plans for a vague future
I’ve been thinking alot about how every project I’ve dedicated alot of time and effort into has always “failed”, or rather I feel that they have failed, over the course of the last six years and how I’ve kind of as a result given up on many of my dreams at the age of 23. I know I am surrounded by good friends, more than I’ve ever had before but I feel curiously lonely.
a. I don’t know what to do in the future
b. I try to not dwell on the past
c. I enjoy the small thingsI applied for an art school and if I get accepted I’m sure i’ll feel better once I get out of this boring tiny town with no creative people; to experience a new group of friends, a larger city and some form of artistic inspiration other than the sleep/walk/eat/sleep I’ve gotten used to.
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Brian Green made a Jesus Seashell t-shirt. So cool!
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I rode a bicycle six kilometres from my friends house in total darkness (I live in the middle of nowhere) on a dirt road whilst listening to music. It was nice. Someone was driving around looking for deer or missing people or something with a huge light and it was kinda spooky in the fog with the ominous mountains so it was like my own private weird bike disco.
I also cut my hair and it turned out weird but that’s ok.
I recorded some music with my friend Camilia. She’s reading Faust by Goethe so she made some lyrics based on some passages from that book. This is a video of a recording session.
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May 2, or my Grand Plan of Self-Improvement
I was running during the evening and I felt like listening to something different than my go-to early post-punk playlist, so i put on some weird piano recordings (the music in this video) and nonsensical rants I must have recorded via my phone when I was at a party sometime.
I rarely drink nowadays or at least I try not to since it messes up my stomach and I get painful cramps or contractions on the left side of my stomach which make it difficult to have any fun or do anything but sit there looking really dissatisfied with every party I am at or escape somewhere to play piano by myself for a few hours.
I’ll very soon be 24 and I feel like I’m too old to keep going out like I was 17 or wasting away what youth I have left on destroying my body. I want that smug smile and good posture healthy people have. I want people to envy me instead of envying people.
So I’ve decided to run to the soundtrack of lo-fi piano and drunken word vomit.